I woke up this morning and was hoping that what I heard yesterday was just a dream.
A friend of ours took his own life.
Even though I barely slept, I am still hoping it was really just a dream while I am writing this. I even wanted to drive to my friend's house just to verify that this is not a joke. I have been checking local news, reports, work email since last night. Anything official that will tell me this is not a rumor.
But I know people who informed me this news wouldn't make a joke like this. Ever.
I am writing this with anger because with many choices my friend could choose to solve the problem he chose to end his life.
I am writing this feeling so upset because my friend chose not to be with his caring family and friends when he felt so down.
I am writing this with sadness because one life is gone. A young life with the brightest future.
Why did he let himself hurt so badly that he couldn't cope with?
With a lot of experience dealing with so many difficult people in his career why could he not be able to deal with a rejection in his personal life?
I would never know the answer to those.
If you recall, I create this blog because I lost both of my parents to cancer. I witnessed their premature death. I learnt the value of life and living in one of the hardest ways, losing the loved ones. And I always hope that what I post here will inspire you to live in your very own best way.
When you feel you hit the bottom, you could only go up from here. You have to believe that there is a better place. You might have to go through a lengthy period of tough, awkward, embarrassing and humiliating time. But you have to stay focused on how to get there, a better place, and be there. You channel to the positives. There will always be tomorrow. There will always be new light showing a new path to walk on, a new day to start from, or even new rain washing the old dirt away. There will be a new person, new people in your life if you open up. There will be people that you will care, help, love and you will get those in return. Soon you will prove that you could be strong and stronger. And before you know it will turn into months and years from today. Then you will look back and you will find that that very pain doesn't matter much anymore.
To you all, I insist that for you to be happy it's all about how you look at things around you. It's all about how you make a choice and there are many choices. You are in charge of your own life. You choose where you want to be and how you want it to be. You don't put your life or your happiness in other people hands. You are responsible for yours.
My deepest condolences to my friend's family.